Sick As Your Secrets

02/16/2025 "But the trouble with falling in love was that it was involuntary, and no matter how well you knew it was a bad idea, if it was going to happen, it happened. And you couldn't prevent it, even if you wanted to." I am sinful and irreverent, an impious woman. You'll never have to doubt, the love I have for you. Hard . Yearning and passion.   I am infatuated. You have allowed me into your world field of colors.  I've kissed your breasts and the area of your stomach. Your legs are wide open. Letting me in. You are the sea, I am the sand.  Let your voice whisper in my ears. Tell me how do you feel? I am drunk from your forbidden paradise. Your moon is the mist in the night. Promise me, you will love me even in the morning. 

02/06/25 "Everything we can bear in this world,  someday we find it in one person, and love it all at once." You make breathing feel like a love language. Breathe into me. I'll breathe into you.  I could be fluent in this with you.  Only if you allowed.  Do you hear me exhale while I sleep?  Do your lungs recognize me?  When your energy walks without knocking?  You light me up. You make space feel like home. I am speaking softness in tongues.  I write a dictionary to explain the way you look at me, with your eyes.  I think I could love you in every dialect, every pause, every deep breath of the truth.  I want to trace your name in the condensation of all the times, I promised, I was done.  The window still open just in case you come back with a new translation.  I choose fluency.  I write every vowel of you into my heart.  Rhyme rather than reason. 

08/30/18 Anyone can lie. One need only have the requisite intention - in other words, to say something with the intention to deceive. Faking, by contrast, is an achievement. To fake things you have to take people in, yourself included. In an important sense, therefore, faking is not something that can be intended, even though it comes about through intentional actions. The liar can pretend to be shocked when his lies are exposed, but his presence is merely a continuation of his lying strategy. The fake really is shocked when he is exposed, since he had created himself a community of trust, of which he himself was a member. Compulsion. Love is addictive. Lies, secrets. Fake. living two different worlds. Authentic. The real. Sudo. We fight and fight. She just wants the truth? I will probably get high so I don’t have to face the truth. The real me? Who really knows that person? I guess, really only I do. For some sick twisted unknown reason, I like that. I like being a secret, a mystery...