Sick As Your Secrets

August 23rd, 2025 " “Its so hard to talk when you want to kill yourself. That's above and beyond everything else, and it's not a mental complaint-it's a physical thing, like it's physically hard to open your mouth and make the words come out. They don't come out smooth and in conjunction with your brain the way normal people's words do; they come out in chunks as if from a crushed-ice dispenser; you stumble on them as they gather behind your lower lip. So you just keep quiet.” I am having painful thoughts, I don't know how to live, anymore. I haven't written it in the last couple of days. I'm blocked mentally. I feel hopeless, defeated, and suicidal. I'm trying so hard to stay above water, barely breathing. I don't know if I could do it here, kill myself, with Celeste around. She'd be the one to find me and I don't think she'd be able to handle more trauma. I'd have to go, elsewhere. Maybe, the beach. Somewhere, I used to...

August 3rd, 2025 “sex is the consolation you have when you can't have love” Can I ask you something? Can we be friends? My intentions are not true to the heart. I want to tear your world apart. Rather let me rephrase that, can our relationship be strictly sexual? Can you tell your girlfriend that you would like to have an open relationship? I mean, obviously we aren't a very compatible pair of human beings, but honestly I still get weak in the knees at just the thought of you strapping me down. And when I hear Paula Cole singing "Feeling Love" from my Spotify Playlist, I can't help but imagine cuffing you to my headboard and doing whatever I want to your naked body. The very thought of your fingertips rubbing my nipples and making them hard. My clit throbbing, my body thrusting, back and forth for the long held in lust I have for you. Tear me apart . Imagine. My blue eyes are starring deep into your soul, I can see thru you. I am watching your hand slowly make ...

August 1st, 2025 "Some of the best moments in life are the ones you can't tell anyone about." Smut. Close your beautiful eyes, and j ust imagine... Maybe, just maybe, someday, my dirty little fantasy will come true. With you. I want to offer you my services, at no cost to you. I'd be ever so willing to be with you for one more night. possibly two. (only if, you are still with her, your girlfriend). I want to be your mistake. Your secret, your little slip up. opppsssss . She will forgive you, after all, its just ONE mistake... RIGHT ? I want to have the power, the seductiveness over everything you. I cum in one form; I am a celestial being, a powerful angel, some call my Iblis, others Satan. Really, I am misunderstood, rebelled against God, and was cast out of my home, Heaven. **** Back to you... You have been unfaithful, as a matter of fact, you have cheated, been cheated on, so....what is wrong with one more time? Oh, the power of knowing the intimate details of you....

 08/01/2025 Desire becomes surrender. Surrender becomes Power. I've decided to never let love in again. I'm trying to find my way. I promise. Even if the road feels like a tightrope. Even if every step still carries your name. Somewhere between the gas light and the good times, I forgot how to unlove you or maybe I'll never learn. I've burned you, let you on fire watching you burn in a blaze of golden hot flames, buried the bridge cut every single cord blocked you in every single way except one that really matters…. You still find me in the darkness in the late hours at night. I still hear whispers of your apologies and my skin like they belong there. You still press your regrets and betrayal into my subconscious, as if I don't already carry the weight of my own. The cruelest part…. I can feel you, before I even think about you. My body remembers you, before my mind does. You grieve me in silence, I grieve you in whispers and tears. Tell me who let love linger where...